"Never work with children or animals" W.C. Fields

Yesterday I took my turn at Jaws' tank.  Its nothing special, just scrub the tank, time his breathing when he comes up for air and talk to any crowds that form about who he is and what he's doing in our cetacean tank.


The update on Jaws is that his non eating issues are pretty much normal behaviors of male sea turtles in captivity during mating season.  You could insert your joke now but just wait.


So about 3ish a crowd of about 30-40 kids forms outside the tank so I go to talk with them.  I'm all researched in things Jaws, I'm fielding all sorts of normal kid type questions with ease.  Oh I'm getting much much better at all of this now.  And then it happened.


"Excuse me but what is he doing now"


It seems that Jaws swam from the side of the pool to the center and proceeded to mate with the drain.  That's right kiddies Jaws is masturbating for the crowd.

I can't laugh, I can't cry and I'm pretty sure I can't tell 8 year olds the truth without causing a news headline.  What I did was take a deep breath, look small children right in the eye and say "oh he just has an itch".  That's right I lied.  Or evaded the specific truth.  It really depends on your perspective and if you want some random stranger and 400 lb turtle teaching your child about sex.