Run for the Ridley

This past weekend was the annual Run for the Ridley, one of the major fundraisers for the Riverhead Foundation.  I volunteered to help with the race, was the least I could do after shaking down 2 sponsors and passing out applications everywhere I could think of.

I've spent the past month or so in the office making phone calls to random strangers.  First batches were to potential sponsors.  You would be surprised how many business do not actually answer their phones during business hours.  I have no real idea if any of them ever called back, I hope a few did.

The runner calls were far more fun.  Most of them did not answer but the ones that did were super nice and very enthusiastic.  Everyone loves the "turtle race"!

Day of the race we're to get there at 6am.  That's right 6am.  You know what I usually do at 6am?  Sleep.  I give myself extra time to get ready and of course the dogs refuse to cooperate.  Sophie goes outside and will just not climb back up the stairs to get in.  I had to go outside and practically carry her in the house.  She weighs 70 friggin pounds that's so not something I like doing at 5:15am.

Dog crisis averted and I'm off to Riverhead.  Its dark and its cold and I'm on the LIE with no other cars so I cannot speed.  That sucks on so many levels I can't even explain.  I arrived in the general vicinity of on time and they had many things ready for us to do.  Set up tables, put big sticks with signs in big pots with dirt and rocks.   For a break around 7ish I went around with Lauren to see if any of the local businesses could give us change for our merchandise table.  The guys at the stationary store near the Aquarium were really excited about the race.  If you're in Riverhead and need a lotto ticket they're the guys to see!

We were more than ready when the runners arrived.  I admit it was a little hard to hand out the numbers when my fingers were so cold.  Yes I had gloves but I left them in the car and yes they kept the car nice and warm.  I'll remember them next year.  So many people and all of them in such high spirits.  You don't often see that many happy New Yorkers in one spot.  Unless its say a Grateful Dead concert and then the happy really is just high.

I wasn't at the starting line but the other volunteers said that it really was an impressive site.  When the race started all of Main Street was flooded with runners, all there to help raise money for the Foundation. 

While we flipped over registration for raffle/awards I snuck over to refreshments and snagged an apple.  *Note to self find vegan food sponsor for next year*.  Jerry and the Mermaid arrived with their crowd pleasing chowder.  If I'm really honest that chowder may be half the reason most of the people run.

Clean up went quickly and I snuck out to my car before I made eye contact with Lauren or Ali and got recruited to unload the truck. The final count numbers came in.  431!  Yeah baby, 431 runners blows past all the other races.  Hopefully a few of those came from my phone calls!

Enjoy the silence?

It's nice to be able to sit here and whine about how my feet hurt from working a fair in bad shoes or my inability to pick a fridge so I can redo my kitchen.  Its nice to just yap about the generally happy moments in my life.  I'm not the most interesting writer, nor the most persuasive.  I tend to keep my political opinions to myself, I'm not much in the mood to argue with anyone about what I believe. But now, on this matter, silence is no longer an option for me.
 

In the past three weeks Five gay teens, from very different parts of the country, have killed themselves.  On September 9, Billy Lucas, a 15-year old from Greensburg, Indiana, hanged himself after constant bullying at school. Two weeks later, Asher Brown, 13, shot himself after coming out in his Houston suburb. On September 28, Seth Walsh hanged himself in his backyard after suffering relentless taunting and abuse at school. That same day, Tyler Clementi jumped to his death in a highly publicized suicide.  The very next day, Raymond Chase, an openly gay 19-year-old at Johnson & Wales University in Providence, Rhode Island, hanged himself in his dorm room.

U.S. Secretary of Education Arne Duncan issued this statement: "This week, we sadly lost two young men who took their own lives for one unacceptable reason: they were being bullied and harassed because they were openly gay or believed to be gay. These unnecessary tragedies come on the heels of at least three other young people taking their own lives because the trauma of being bullied and harassed for their actual or perceived sexual orientation was too much to bear. This is a moment where every one of us - parents, teachers, students, elected officials, and all people of conscience - needs to stand up and speak out against intolerance in all its forms. Whether it's students harassing other students because of ethnicity, disability or religion; or an adult, public official harassing the President of the University of Michigan student body because he is gay, it is time we as a country said enough. No more. This must stop."

We all feel sympathy (at least those of us who are actually human) but that's just not enough anymore.  These little bully monsters didn't just hatch, they have parents.  Parents who let their kids use the word gay as an adjective for all the icky moments of their life.  Parents who don't take the time to teach their children the difference between entertainment and torment.  Parents who don't love and respect their children enough to teach them how to love and respect others.

I think that the parents of these bullies should be forced to sit in a room with the parents of these dead teens.  They should be forced to look into their eyes and see the pain that can only come from losing a child.  Perhaps then they can realize that something has gone horribly wrong in their parenting plan.

We can't blame all of this on the bullies and their parents, no matter how self satisfying it is to do so.  If you keep refusing a minority basic rights, kids will grow up under the impression that members of said minority are somehow worth less than “normal” people, that it is ok to look down on them, to bully them.  

President Obama has lead the gay community down a road to nowhere.  During his campaign he promised to repeal the Defense of Marriage act, its still there.  He promised to repeal Don't Ask, Don't Tell, it hasn't gone away.  He said he would push for employment non-discrimination laws and expanded hate crimes laws, there is nothing.  Its time to hold him and the rest of our elected officials accountable.

Its not okay to be silent on the matter anymore.  Do you really intend to look the other way while these acts of hate and torment are perpetrated on our family, on our friends, on our neighbors...on our children?